West Meets East©

By Caroline Patrick

The Gift of Gratitude

This is the time of year when I get sentimental about the people in my life, those who I love, those who are live close by, those far away and those who have passed on. And how about those little four-footed creatures, my numerous pets, who stood by me when I felt all alone. It is the time of year called winter, a time to make a fire in the fireplace, snuggle up on the couch with a cup of hot herbal tea, and remember. Remember friends, relatives, children when they were young, life-changing moments, and those who changed your life. Honor all who have passed by your doorstep whether they were welcome or not, as they have brought both the Yin and Yang of what life has to offer.

Live each day in awareness and not expectation, because expectation is toxic. Making long-range plans is bad habit of mine. I have cried a lot of useless tears waiting for the expected. From planned surprise parties going totally wrong, to expecting a loved one to "know" what I wanted for Christmas without asking. "Why shouldn't he know, he knows what I like," was my expectation until, at 37, I finally realized the man of my dreams just drove seven hours after a fourteen-hour day, to be home for Christmas. Wasn't that enough? It is a waste of energy, emotion and time to expect others to read your mind. Tell them what you want, beginning in August and then you might - note, I said might! - get the present you want! Maturity is a good thing I have found, as "IT" isn't about you anymore. It is about the world.

Gratitude is a desired quality which I didn't totally understand until a few years ago. Growing up, my mother and father took us visiting. We made the rounds to show our respect to our aunts, uncles, grandparents, and our parents' close friends. We dressed in our best and were polite to our elders. We sat at a "children's table" when eating and, if you behaved yourself, by age 12 graduated to the Big Table! I'm glad those days are over, as I prefer to wear comfortable clothes and include the kids' conversation at the dinner table, but disrespect from younger people does bother me. Feng Shui does offer many suggestions on raising children, and how the location of their bedroom, desk and arranged seating at the dining table can help their happiness, knowledge and health.

Send, call or email those Helpful People who have changed your lives. Remember compassion, respect, and Gratitude. I received a note from my 92-year-old dear aunt this week. Her writing is as fresh and clear as her beauty and attitude. After caring for a sick mother-in-law for seven years, then her mother for 30 years, and then her ill husband for the last several years, she is now living alone, but not lonely. She says, "I drive the old ladies to bingo, the doctors and church every week, and oh yes, I just got my drivers license renewed for three more years." What a fun person she is. She expects nothing and lives each day to the fullest. Her home also is a great example of Feng Shui. A slight hill behind the house in the Ozark Hills protects her from harsh winds. A running stream flows by her home on the front of the property, bringing money in a slow steady fashion. I thank her for being in my life as an example of compassion and love.

I can count over 30 relatives who have influenced my life in a positive way, whether they drank too much or yelled now and then, understanding their frustration gave me a hands-on kaleidoscope of life, living, anger, forgiveness, courage, spirit, what to do and what not to do. Send them meaningful Gratitude, as they are part of who you have become. I watched people laugh, tell stories, celebrate, cry, have faith and loose faith. Choose to cultivate your Chi or energy, which in turn gives your family a boost of blessings in the best way. Learn through experience, and learn to say, "I'm sorry or I'm wrong!" when needed, as this is your great chance to become healthier, wiser, and a great teacher.

I personally want to give Gratitude to some great friends who helped me put together and support my business in Benicia, California for several years. Barbara Pike, who has been a treasure in my life through "thick and thin." We met fifteen or so years ago at a Sacred Art's Class. We giggled too much and the teacher put us in a separate room while the "sacred music" was playing as we were disturbing the other students. Barbara is now offering a pet-sitting business. She is a natural with animals. Her recent duck sitting was a blast. Her number is 707-745-3420 if you are needing her services.

Paula Buchanan, who dedicated herself to the study of Feng Shui and helped me consistently and is now flying through college with her brilliance. Colleen Smith - wow - a networker who could organize anything at the drop of a hat; the City of Benicia is now enjoying her dedication and abilities. (Give her a raise, Benicia, as she does more than her share.) Suzi Crammer helped me in the beginning and now has her own shop in the Tannery Building. Honesty and humor are her assets. Pam Powers, whom I met many years ago and did the illustrations for her book Power Animals. Cynthia G., artist, Chi Gong instructor, with whom I shared a studio for a few years. Debby Armfield, a great massage therapist, who I miss dearly, and deep Gratitude to the many weekly customers, clients, friends and students who supported me and continue to do so via email and phone.

A special thanks and Gratitude to John Moses, editor of the Benicia Herald, who gave in to my nagging to do this column so readers could enjoy learning about the Art of Placement and how changing or getting rid of 27 things can change your life!