West Meets East©

By Caroline Patrick

Reconnecting with Family II

It is rare to expect a good turnout for family reunions when today’s families are spread over several states. Recently my daughter and I met for a special lunch in the middle of California. At 18 she left home to launch her career. We rarely had the privilege of living in the same state after that, so once again I combined business with pleasure and was able to spend a few hours with her, as she lives near-by. After giving a Feng Shui winter workshop in Benicia, California, I looked forward to our planned private time together. Current topics soon turned to “have you heard from Aunt Ruthie (who is 97)?” and “how is Aunt and Uncle this one and that one?” Lonesomeness stirred in the air as we ended our meal with a non-calorie bread pudding topping off our celebration. Silence followed as we fed our faces and remembered all those fun get-togethers in the Midwest. Suddenly I came to my senses, also remembering my hay fever, the relentless humidity, chiggers, tornados and the endless phone calls of my loving Grandmother calling every few hours making sure I was not killing my children with the wrong food, toys, soaps and asking if they were dressed in appropriate clothing, correct shoes, what was for dinner, etc. No matter what, I found myself missing Family. Besides now I was the Grandmother behaving in some of these traditional tribal ways!

My parents passed away over 15 years ago and my husband’s parents are also gone. Now it was our responsibility to teach the younger generations the meaning of belonging. My daughter and I decided that we would make this summer gathering a special Kansas City Family Reunion. I put out the word over the next few months and let my first cousins, 22 to be exact on my mother’s side of the family, know we were coming that way. Thanks to email, the modern technology of communication, I was able to “dish out” tablespoons of guilt, to those who weren’t sure they could make the Reunion.

The results were magic. All plans fell in perfect order. I was delighted to see everyone. Some of those people were only ten years old when I last saw them. Most of them now had white hair and lots of grandchildren, while I only had two grandkids and brown hair, thanks to some help from Ms. Clairol! Children buzzed in and out of the large country home of my oldest cousin and his extended family. Religion was a big part of my young life and no matter what my current extended belief experiences have taught me, I became a child once more, speaking to my elders who are still living and highly respected. Conversations and laughter filled the house and outside patios. Green grass and trees covered the property and an umbrella of happiness spread over the landscape. The large pond provided snapping turtles, fish, mud, rocks and fallen tree limbs, a perfect setting for kids to go wild, and they did. Now and then I heard a young mother loudly inquire, “Can you see my kids head bobbing around down there?” to anyone listening. A positive answer would float in the summer air toward the house and assure the Mom that all was well, at least for now. Everyone bonded, just as if the conversations were left off in mid-air yesterday, and not 10 or 20 years ago.

Food was stacked to the “rafters” and everyone had worked up an appetite. Just then I heard a big, loud voice shout “HEY, gather-round, time to eat!” Relatives young and old poured into the air-conditioned house, all forming a huge circle which wove in and out the kitchen, dining room continuing into the living room and up the open stairs of the huge house. The generations formed by seven brothers and sisters filled every vacant space. Everyone held hands as “the blessing” was given by the oldest living elder, 89 years old. You could hear a pin drop as his voice vibrated through out the home, giving praise and thanks for all those living and dead. My skin chilled over and over again as all generations past and present became one entity. I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Peaking through prayerful eyes, I saw my family scatter about the room, not physically together, but together in a larger sense. The ceremony bonded us together once more. I could feel the presence of those who had passed over and the room was “filled to overflowing.”

I heard “Amens” and knew that moment in time was over and would never happen again. The day ended too soon. Goodbyes lasted longer than usual, as I will never see many of these people again. A lonesome conversation in a cafe created all that happened that day and it was special. I enjoyed seeing my brother’s grown children and their children. I served an extra teaspoon of guilt for that to manifest. The dust billowed on the upper road as cars found their way to the main road. Suddenly I felt hot, sticky and itchy and was looking forward a cold shower or maybe a swimming pool. My brother leaned over and said, “You know, we all kind of look alike.” “Yeah,” I agreed.

We drove south toward Oklahoma as the sun was setting, and in the next few days we began to see other people who looked like us. The closeness of family was repeated with my husband’s relatives. High school memories were around each bend, on water and the roads. Laughter about the “good ole days” between picnics and outdoor fun reminded us why we married and stayed together throughout the years. Boat rides, tours of living caves and paddle boat on the river rounded out the vacation.

Making things happen is a Fire Energy Action. Decide what you would like to happen and make it work! Is it a new job, travel, getting pregnant, building a home, moving or marriage plans? Feng Shui can assist you. Go to my website to learn more about the Elements and how they interact.

CLASSES AND WORKSHOPS 2006------sign up now------

1. ART classes and workshops ---- from 6 weeks to Saturday All Day Workshops!

2. FENG SHUI ISLAND TOUR---- on site evaluations in the San Juan Islands, WASHINGTON STATE

Where is the entrance or “Mouth of Chi” to the Island?

Please email caroline@fengshuiartistry.com for more information on classes or to purchase her greeting cards.

For Pet Sitting call Barbara Pike at “I Care Pet Services,” 707-745-3420

There are many Feng Shui products available online, but here are my favorites where I personally shop, www.yunlintemple.org for the finest quality; www.harmonydesigns.net ask for Shelly; www.fengshuishopper.com ask for Marina; and www.fengshuifusions.com . All items are cleared and blessed.

Caroline Patrick Caroline's Feng Shui Concepts Mt. Vernon, WA 360-424-1501

caroline@fengshuiartistry.com www.fengshuiartistry.com www.moongateschool.com

Caroline Patrick, Feng Shui consultant/practitioner, teacher/speaker, Feng Shui artist and writer, lives in the San Juan Islands, off the coast of Washington. Her weekly newspaper article called WEST MEETS EAST is a popular Feng Shui advice column. She enjoys answering your questions, when possible. Some questions will be chosen for publication with the permission from the reader. Enjoy her new 5 Element attached-folding cards which can be used as a Feng Shui enhancement or correction in any space. Larger prints of several selected paintings are also available. For consultations, speaking/teaching engagements and art evaluations contact her at caroline@fengshuiartistry.com or visit her websites at www.fengshuiartistry.com and www.moongateschool.com.

Any suggestions given in this column are only for entertainment. Please contact your physician for any medical or herbal advice or diagnosis. Caroline Patrick is not responsible for any misuse of her advice or suggestions.