Confusion, frustration and stagnation are but a reflection of ourselves. Daily stress builds as we try to comfort ourselves with comforting things. My brother’s favorite comment when comforted about excess purchases was "I deserve it!"

Adults that were deprived as children, buy grown up toys. Credit cards make these dreams possible

Daily trips to the malls for instant gratification are the norm. Where did we fall "off the common sense wagon"? Homes bulge with necessary objects and we drown in our materialism. Sound familiar?

What are we looking for? Excess and clutter are but a symptom of some larger problem.

During feng shui consultations, I see an overabundance of furniture, toys, dishes, dried flowers, knick-knacks and food. Where does it end?

Buying things is a form of procrastination. It takes time, energy and can be temporarily fulfilling. The home becomes burdened with the weight of our expectations. Do yourself a favor — Lighten the load. Give away, sell or throw away excess. Objects block chi and lower your ability to get on with your life.

Children’s rooms bulge with computers, toys, clothes, shoes, clock radios and TVs. This week alone, I saw six children’s beds placed in wrong feng shui positions causing insomnia. Ease the flow of knowledge by removing the electromagnetic appliances from the bedroom. Bodies heal as they sleep in a feng shui friendly environment.

Waiting for a teen to clean their room can only impede the whole family’s harmony and balance; maybe the young person’s room is positioned in a important section of the bagua or grid placed over the home which blocks your career. Shutting the door to his/her space only shuts off viable chi in the home causing energy blockage in that section of the house.

Consider other chores for the child, if cleaning their room is a weekly battle. During our children’s teen years, I let them chose chores. On a farm, there is plenty of hard work to share. My son chose outside work with crops, animals and harvesting and hoeing. My daughter loved to water, drive tractors outside, but also helped inside the house with washing clothes, loading the dishwasher and putting groceries away. We all canned food. From planting to gathering it was a family project

Allowances were given but also taken away for discipline reasons. They also worked in town after school. Everyone has to decide how to keep peace and tranquility in the home for their own family.

Here is one of many questions pertaining to children and the frustration over everyone’s schedules in today’s rushed life style. As for me? I’ve given myself a couple of hours for relaxation. I’m headed to Toys R Us for a few necessary purchases. The grandkids are coming soon and I must prepare. My charge card is ready for action! Help!

I have a million questions about Feng Shui, but first of all I need ideas about how to get harmony in my house. I have to battle with my children just to get them to clean up after themselves. I try to tell them when you have a clean home you feel better and it helps your moods, that didn’t help. I know kids are kids. I would be very grateful for any help you can offer. Thank you and have a great day!

Have you read my newspaper columns on these subjects? Go to www.fengshuiartistry.com and scan down to moongateschool, click on it. The class schedules are listed. There is a class to be held on April 27 to map your home. This will help you determine where your career, family, wealth guas are located.
Many times children’s bedrooms are placed in the wrong gua or section of the home. They can become overactive or under active, thin or overweight. Too much stress is placed on the child if he is placed in the far back right side of the house. This gua is reserved for the disciplinary responsibility of the parents of the home. It is hard to evaluate any home without more information. When giving a consultation, I prefer to see the home or pictures of the house. I want to know the ages of the children and birthdays of the family to check out the elements you have already incorporated into the home and the favorite colors of clothing worn by each family member. For example, wearing too many cool colors in the wintertime doesn’t help the immune system. Wearing excessive reds, oranges in the summer months might overheat young children. Also foods relate to the season cycles; some foods are best for your body during a certain season.

The subject of artwork should be considered for improving and activating different sections of the home. A slow moving water picture could be chosen for enhancing the career zone near the front door to the house.

Everyone in the family is responsible for improving the chi or energy. When my children were teenagers, we moved to a ranch 10 miles from town. They had to be very creative to get my attention. When there are rows of garden to hoe and canning to be done, time is wasted when arguing. I worked for the college teaching art and ran a home, took care of numerous farm animals. My husband was home on weekends. It was a hard time, but a happy time. The kids were too busy with chores to get into trouble.

I had the privilege of seeing part of an Oprah show today, where she expressed the same feelings I have about kids today. I feel too many things are given and not earned when all they really want is your time, not things! When trying to give your children things you didn’t have, or competing with the ex, by buying the child expensive possessions which they haven’t earned, the messages they are getting from the parents is "divide and conquer" causing confusion and making Mom and Dad feel crazy. Then they will give the child anything they want to shut them up.

Thanks for listening to my lecture — Caroline Patrick.

Visit Caroline’s Arts and Feng Shui Shoppe at 129 First St. Suite K, in Benicia to sign our interest lists for upcoming feng shui, fountain making and art classes. Register for the Feng Shui Mapping Your Home class on April 27 in person or by phone (707) 748-1127. For more information on feng shui and art visit www.fengshuiartistry.com and click on moongateschool. To schedule a feng shui consultation for home, business or garden on sight or by fax, call (707) 748-1127.